The problem with raising a child like Finn is that it is, all at once, enlightening, heartbreaking, hilarious and more often than not, downright bloody exhausting. While I can just about cope with the fact that he spends his days bouncing off the walls while other children colour in sedately and wonder where their next bag of sweets is coming from, dealing with his almost relentless questions and correcting his oh so innocent but slightly bonkers theories on everything from what kind of sofas people from China prefer to why "stupid" doesn't count as a swear word, quite frankly takes up more brain space than I've got spare, occasionally makes me splutter and once in a while makes me splash tears all over his gorgeous little face...
Take these three fine examples of four year old logic...
Oh my God! This queue is huggge...
Finley!! Don't say Oh my God! It's very, very naughty.
Oh my God Mummy, calm down, it isn't naughty at all.
Yes it is Finley, it is outrageously naughty.
Oh my God Mummy, don't be so silly, it just means I'm a friend of Jesus...
Mummy where do babies come from?
We've talked about this Finn, Mummies and Daddies give each other a special hug and that's how the babies are made.
I knnnnnooooow that! But I don't know what you mean. How is it different to a normal snug?
Well Sweetie, these special hugs are only something grown ups do, so you don't need to worry about it yet...
Ok, but Mummy?
Do the Daddies ever come behind the Mummies and surprise them with a special hug...??
Mum don't you think it will be sad when we don't know each other anymore?
Baby we will always know each other. I'm your Mummy and your are my little boy.
Yes but when I've grown up and I'm a man you won't recognise me will you?
Oh Finn, that isn't how it works, I will see you grow up, so I will always recognise you...
Yes but Mummy?
Will you understand me?